Nedarim 22A

אילו לא חמאת בה אימה מילין דעזיבה ⁠— בכדי לא אדרתה! מי אדרתה? אמרה ליה: לא, ושרייה.

Had her mother not seen inappropriate [aziva] matters or behavior in her that should be stopped, she would not have taken a vow with regard to her for nothing; had you known that the neighbors would say that, would you have taken a vow with regard to her? She said to him: No, and he dissolved the vow for her.

בר ברתיה דרבי ינאי סבא אתא לקמיה דרבי ינאי סבא, אמר ליה: אילו הוה ידעת דפתחין פינקסך וממשמשין בעובדך, מי נדרת? אמר ליה: לא, ושרייה.

The Talmud relates: The son of the daughter of R' Yannai the Elder came before R' Yannai the Elder to dissolve a vow. He said to him: Had you known that when you make a vow they open your record book [pinekas] in heaven and examine your actions, would you have vowed? He said to him: No, and he dissolved the vow for him.

אמר רבי אבא: מאי קראה ⁠— ״ואחר נדרים לבקר״. ואף על גב דפתח רבי ינאי ליה ⁠— אנן לא פתחינן ליה בהא.

R' Abba said: What is the verse from which it is derived that taking a vow leads to one’s deeds being examined? It is “And after vows to make inquiry” (Proverbs 20:25). This is interpreted to mean that after one takes a vow, his actions are reviewed in heaven. The Talmud comments: And although R' Yannai broached dissolution with him in this way, we do not broach dissolution in this manner for one who vows, by asking if he regrets it because his actions will be examined in heaven. This is because one might be embarrassed, upon hearing such a question, to say that he does not have regret, and he will claim untruthfully that he is regretful.

ולא פתחינן בהדא אחרנייתא, דאמר רבה בר בר חנה אמר רבי יוחנן: מאי פתח ליה רבן גמליאל לההוא סבא: ״יש בוטה כמדקרות חרב ולשון חכמים מרפא״. כל הבוטה ⁠— ראוי לדוקרו בחרב, אלא ⁠— לשון חכמים מרפא.

And we also do not broach dissolution in this other way, as Rabba bar bar Ḥana said that R' Yoḥanan said: What type of dissolution did Rabban Gamliel broach for a certain elderly man who had taken a vow and came before him for dissolution? He informed him that it is written: “There is one who speaks like the piercing of a sword, but the tongue of the wise is health” (Proverbs 12:18), which is interpreted to mean: Anyone who verbally expresses the language of a vow, it is appropriate to pierce him with a sword, but he has another option: “The tongue of the wise is health,” since the rabbis can release him from his vow. Quoting this verse with its interpretation is also not an acceptable method of broaching dissolution.