Ketubot 74B

ממאנת והולכת לה.

she may refuse her husband and go on her way. According to this opinion, the marriage did not take effect at all, despite the fact that they had sex, because the betrothal involved an error.

תנו רבנן: הלכה אצל חכם והתירה ⁠— מקודשת. אצל רופא וריפא אותה ⁠— אינה מקודשת. מה בין חכם לרופא? חכם עוקר את הנדר מעיקרו, ורופא אינו מרפא אלא מכאן ולהבא.

§ A baraita states: If a man betroths a woman on condition that there are no vows incumbent upon her to fulfill, but there are vows incumbent upon her, and she goes to a halakhic authority and he dissolves her vows, she is betrothed. However, if he betroths her on condition that she has no blemishes, but she does have blemishes, and she goes to a doctor and he heals her blemishes, she is not betrothed. The Talmud inquires: What is the difference between a halakhic authority and a doctor? The Talmud explains: When a halakhic authority dissolves a vow, he uproots the vow retroactively. It is as if she had never vowed at all, and therefore she was in fact not bound by vows at the time of their betrothal. But a doctor only heals from here onward. Since she had blemishes at the time of betrothal, she is in breach of his condition.

והתניא: אצל חכם והתירה, אצל רופא וריפא אותה ⁠— אינה מקודשת! אמר רבא: לא קשיא, הא ⁠— רבי מאיר, הא ⁠— רבי אלעזר. הא רבי מאיר, דאמר: אדם רוצה שתתבזה אשתו בבית דין. הא רבי אלעזר, דאמר: אין אדם רוצה שתתבזה אשתו בבית דין.

The Talmud raises a difficulty: But isn’t it taught in a different baraita that if she goes to a halakhic authority and he dissolves her vows, or to a doctor and he heals her blemishes, she is not betrothed? Rava said: This is not difficult, for this baraita follows the opinion of R' Meir, and that one follows R' Elazar. The Talmud elaborates: This baraita, which states that if her vows were dissolved by a halakhic authority she is betrothed, is in accordance with R' Meir, who said that a man is willing for his wife to be degraded by going to court to have her vow dissolved. That baraita follows the opinion of R' Elazar, who said that a man is not willing for his wife to be degraded in court. Consequently, even if she went to a halakhic authority and he dissolved her vows, such a solution is unacceptable to her husband, as he did not want her to go to court. Therefore, the betrothal is invalid even after the dissolution of the vow.